Hello !!

The past few weeks, the coffee table discussions have been hijacked by a couple of my gadget freak colleagues who have discovered newer ways of using their mobile phones. So now they can do pretty much everything they could on their laptops...compiling code, surfing the web, checking mail, in general wasting company time !!. And they have been trying to convince me into buying one of those cool phones that costs a fortune. I have been holding out for now.

It is easy for me to hold out. I am not exactly a gadget freak. Especially since these new phones really are monstrosities. I keep telling my friend that it’s a good thing that he is married because with a phone that looks like a walkie talkie from the sixties, it is hard to impress the ladies. I call these new age, high tech phones as the ‘chick repellents’ (pardon the sexist undertone, but you get the picture right ?). I am not really into any gadget where I would need to explain why in spite of its ugliness, it is still cool (As it is, I have hard job explaining that about myself).

And while we are on subject of cell phones, I might as well add that I am tired of these warnings about the health risks posed by these phones. “Cell phone radiation is bad for your health”, “Oh, don’t keep the phone in your shirt pocket, it will affect the heart”. Gee, really, is that even an advice you can give to a guy ?. What are men supposed to do, keep the phones in their trouser pockets instead ?. Well, let me tell you people, men would any day take chances with their heart, all right. So go easy on the health advisory.

Infact, even as I type this post, Steven Spielberg is busy making a movie on this very topic. That's right, the movie is called “Saving Ryan’s Privates” starring Tom Hanks as Ryan and Charlie Sheen as...well. And Bollywood is already making the Indian version of it in which Govinda will be seen playing both Ryan and...as himself. The climax is supposed to be thrilling with the hero being strapped around the waist with a belt of mobile phones and the bad guy threatening to call all the numbers at once. For a country of more than a billion people, that’s not a bad idea. This country needs more such belts.

Anyway, the point is I am satisfied with my 2500 rupee cell phone. I admit it does not have a fancy GPS receiver or VPN connectivity or the super cool 3D surround sound. But it does let me get even with people who have pissed me off especially those who keep their phones in their trouser pockets.

Hey, is that your phone ringing ?